I think I'm rambling, but does that make sense?

This might just be my superpower... is that lame?

Dave Endsor

Feb 16, 2024

I don’t think I have many go-to phrases.

People who know me well, please comment if I do… (is that risky?! We’ll see!)

Anyway…

However, I am very aware of how much I say that particular line in the title.

And for good reason.

I promise you it’s intentional

I’ve explained before that as an ENTP, I love new ideas, big thought-provoking conversations and creative brainstorming sessions.

However…

It also means I get very excitable and want to get my ideas across as frequently as possible, sometimes repeatedly.

Now this isn’t because I think I’m always right, or because I want to make sure I’m heard first – although many, many years ago this might have seemed the case.

(That’s youth and career naivety for you!)

It’s simply because I do my best work out loud. I like to talk through an idea and, as I’m doing so, I’m often able to improve on it there and then.

Talking it through kicks my brain into gear and, with the help of others in the room, the idea develops into something much better than if I’d just sat there pondering on my own.

Now this will resonate with many people, but it will also do the opposite to those who see these kinds of sessions as a real challenge. A meeting where they really want to be heard but struggle to find a space in the conversation to add their thoughts.

I make it my responsibility to give those folks the time to share their ideas because, as they sit there silently watching and listening, their brain is whirring with a spark of inspiration that’s often exactly what we need.

They just haven’t got the confidence or belief to jump in.

For you extroverts out there, you need to understand that someone staying quiet does not mean a lack of ideas. Far from it.

(I’ll write something more on this in the future).

Here it comes

When I get too excited with an idea however, or I’m not feeling like I’m getting the visual or audible validation I think it deserves, I keep repeating the same points and justifications to try and get that response.

Who doesn’t love good feedback, right?

Now, frankly, this is a pain in the arse for others. They’re either thinking “shut up, Dave we like it”, or “shut up, Dave, it’s rubbish”, or just “shut up, Dave!”

And don’t worry, I’ve got thick enough skin to not be offended by the last one.

When I find myself in that scenario and I know it’s now my time to rapidly simmer down, I roll out my go-to phrase: “I think I’m rambling, but does that make sense?”

I use it when I can’t think of a way to end my point, usually because I’ve made the same one three times in the last five minutes.

But it’s also an easy get out for me to quickly end whatever I’ve been waffling on about. Or, I hope, passionately making a valid point, or sharing a great idea.

(You can waffle passionately, right?!)

More importantly, it’s a small signal to others that I’m ending my point and I want to hear their thoughts.

Finding your own phrase, especially if like me you’re prone to dominating ideas sessions, is a great way of welcoming others to share their points, as well as forcing you to stop. Immediately.

This doesn’t mean you need to talk less, but doing so shows the more introverted types that you recognise it’s time for you to sit back and let them speak.